The 100th Post Fail

I’ve been wracking my brain trying figure out something for this post that would melt some faces. I couldn’t really come up with anything, especially since my planned rant against all online rating services and communities was greeted by all nays and no yays by my friends. Therefore, I’ll have to move that to a later fantastic (damn right!) post. So for now, I’ll succumb to my writer’s block and just say, “Screw my 100th post.”

P.S. Writer’s block is an actual disease–a form of dystonia.

P.P.S. Here’s a map of where I ate for Spring Break 2009. Think of it as a preview of musings to come.

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I’m Totally Unqualified – The Palm

This is part 3 of an ongoing self-depracating series of life assessments and observations conveniently disguised as pseudo-legitimate discussion on food. Just in case you haven’t noticed.

Last Saturday day, our merry gang went to The Palm for an anti-medschool-formal-preparty dinner (I swear we’re not all as unenthusiastic about school spirit as I am).  This masculating meal of slabs of (almost) raw beef would be a precursor to a night of binge drinking, yelling, dancing, and–at least for some in the group–vomitting. General chaos would reign in the largest non-gambling hotel in the western hemisphere for one night. And yes, a good majority of that madness was part of my plan for the night.

However, I think I’ve learned my lesson, and will just focus on the food, and not the shitshow afterwards.

So back to The Palm: I’ve been here once before. I’m not the biggest fan of steak; the thought of paying $40-$50 for a couple ounces of meat alone never really struck me as fun (and in these times, economical). But, the steakhouse did have a great deal for steak and lobster for two, which I gladly shared with my man-friend, the Canadian.

Our meal started with a salad, some greens and tomatoes, topped with house vinaigrette. It was plain.

At one point Jerry got into a heated argument with Tucker. A hazy memory has concealed any possible recollection of the topic of contention, but all I have to say is this: Don’t mess with Jerry–He’s INTENSE. The finger-pointing screams, “Don’t F with me!”

Next came the steak and lobster. It was at this point in my life that I realized that I’m totally unqualified to write about food. The reason? I asked for some A1 sauce. Strike one. My friends were quick to point out the faux paux I had just committed. Yeah, I guess it’s common sense to eat the meat to taste the meat. I wouldn’t be paying $40 otherwise. A1 sauce theoretically should even make my shoes taste like steak doused in sauce. But I ignored them anyway. I sprinkled some A1 sauce on the side, and dabbed some pieces of my medium-way-too-rare filet mignon every now and then. The way-too-rare was my fault, too. Being the fatass that I am, I should’ve known filet mignon is a thicker cut, and should’ve warranted a medium instead of medium-rare. I think at this point in the night, I have two strikes against me. Did I finish dinner with three strikes?

Let me think.

I can’t really come up with any other grave “foodie” mistakes I committed during dinner, although I probably committed infinitely more later on in the night (again, I gotta refrain from talking about that stuff). But to reiterate: I asked for A1 at a steakhouse.

Dinner was capped off with a slice of key lime pie. A tart and citrus concoction of pudding-like consistency molded on top of a crumbling graham crust, I could ask for nothing better in my drunken state, with the exception of a larger stomach and faster metabolism so I could have actually finished the slice after eating bread, salad, meats, and sides.

Overall, I think this dinner, and this post, is good reason for anyone to not listen to my opinions about food, and possibly even stuff in general. What makes me qualified to be anything? Definitely not this. But hey, this post isn’t going to be about me going all emo-like and what not. You’re not particularly qualified for anything either. Yes, you. The Internet. I would never solicit advice from the billions of anonymous web-surfers in the world. And neither should you (which I will be further discussing in my super-snazzy-but-not-really-anything-special 100th post).

This Is A Mess

I mean the burrito from Qdoba. Not me. Really.

Although I do have a problematic tendency to go overboard sometimes in regards to both food and drink (and maybe behavior as well). Given the option to pile on the toppings, I usually top off the burrito with cheese, pico de gallo, lettuce, corn salsa, green salsa, and habanero salsa. My burrito ends up looking like a bloated package before the end of the assembly line, much like my stomach after eating the burrito, and shortly before passing out in a food coma. I still prefer Chipotle for some unknown reason–call it a gut feeling.

I Have A Problem.

I’m lazy.

LAZY.

In college, I remember telling the pre-med advisors my one weakness was my laziness. They laughed. At my UCSD interview, I told them I was not good at keeping myself motivated (euphemism for “I’m lazy”). I didn’t get accepted.

And now, I’m getting too lazy to cook. I tried to make oyako-don this past week, and instead of using chicken, I used tofu. Cutting up and de-fatting chicken is too much work. Washing and chopping vegetables are also too much work for me. I stopped after slicing up an onion. I added in frozen peas to build up my cooking ego (more ingredients + more color = automatically better cook, right?).

I just don’t have anything to write now. It’s not writer’s block, it’s because I’m filled to the brim with sloth and gluttony (but that’s a separate issue). I’d like to elaborate on the intrinsic problems that accompany laziness and a goal of becoming a surgeon, but…I want to take a nap right now. Well, at least vegetarians would be pleased that I’m eating veggie-centric dishes. Except I killed at least 4 chick embryos to kick up the protein content of the dish. Woops.

The Lazy Man’s Semi-Vegetarian Oyakodon

Add onions, tofu, peas, soy sauce, sugar, rice wine, hon dashi, chicken broth, and water in a wok. Season everything to taste. Add eggs. Cook rice. Poof–you’ve accomplished cooking food while being lazy. Hooray?

I’m Back! No Need For Fanfare.

I realize that I haven’t posted in a month or so. Several things happened: 1. I had a final, which I just found out I bombed (thanks to nutrition and radiology); 2. I’ve been busy with a research project that I’ve held off due to the previously mentioned final, and possibly this blog (ha!); 3. I have a test coming up in a couple months which will basically decide the rest of my life/career. Not stressful at all.

Oh, I’ve been trying to catch up on life, too. That’s still a work in progress. Don’t think I’ll ever outgrow this awkward thing.

So you can probably understand why I’ve neglected the blogosphere recently (or not–it doesn’t bother me). I also haven’t gone out to eat as much. In the past month, I have probably tried one new restaurant, which I didn’t photograph. Maybe the foodblog obsession has died down due to real life. Hopefully I’ll make it to my 100th post–I’m pretty close–and, what do you know, it may even be positive!

Anyway, I went to Korea House about a month ago. I think it was for Chinese New Years, actually. Why would a Chinese kid go to a Korean place for New Years? Because I’ve never really celebrated Chinese New Years probably. And I like the place.

Korea House is a typical hole-in-the-wall Asian joint, complete with 70’s/80’s style cafeteria tables and chairs, placed back-to-back for the type of dining (or working) efficiency we’ve come to expect from all Asians.

What I like about Korea House is their banchan spread. While it may not be the most colorful, or freshest, or even homemade, it has variety, which brings back all those fond childhood memories of buffet plates piled high with one scoop of everything. My favorites include the potatoes glazed with sweet soy sauce and the bean sprouts.

I ordered something I’ve never ordered before: the kimchi jigae, or kimchi stew. Most of their stews are perfect for cold winter days: thick and steaming. But the kimchi jigae is a watery concoction of red and sour, dotted with chunks of pork rib meat, kimchi, and tofu. The broth lacked the complexity of their better menu choices, such as their yook gae jang or soon tofu. I’m sure I could microwave kimchi juice and come up with something similar. I’ll go back to the yook gae jang next time.

My friend ordered their soon tofu. It looked good. I don’t usually order it because it has seafood. I’d order it maybe if they offered a pork or beef version, but at the moment I’m not too fond of shellfish in my tofu. It’s probably based on a baseless aversion to shellfish and other seafood. Yes, I’m strange and possibly irrational. It’s probably also why I’m not paid to professionally review food.

It’s not the best, but the food is pretty good. I’d go here every so often, just not too often. My qualms with Korean cuisine in general are the lack of choices: every time I eat Korean food it’s stew or bbq. I’ve looked through cookbooks numerous times (I don’t cook, I just like looking at recipes and pictures), and they’re all the same items. I wish there was more variety, but I can’t really complain when what is available is pretty good. Umm…so yea…I like Korea House.

Korea House

6410 Charlotte Pike # 108

Nashville, TN‎

(615) 352-2790‎