I haven’t really been eating out a lot lately, since I probably blew a couple Benjamins while eating out in Los Angeles. However, I have been reading Tucker Max’s I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, and, quite frankly, it has made me re-evaluate 90% of my life and has inspired me to become a better man. Those of us who have read it can understand after finishing the book. My definition of “better” is probably different than yours (and some may hope different than Tucker’s), but I don’t think any man can finish reading the book without becoming a better man for it. But to make this post food, related, here is just one reason why I think Tucker is awesome:
Halfway there, in some shit0bag cow town called Barswtow, Junior tells me to exit the highway and pull into a place called “In-N-Out.” I was not impressed:
“Dude, where are we going? This place looks like shit.”
Junior glared at me like I had turned down sex with Penelope Cruz and said nothing. He insisted that we go inside, as he said that one couldn’t properly drive and give these burgers the attention necessary at the same time. He ordered me the Double-Double, and looking at it, I was still unimpressed. It’s just a fucking hamburger.
I have only fallen in love three times in my life, and the first bite of that Double-Double was one of those times. The crispy bun complimenting the cool lettuce, the special sauce accentuating the fresh tomato, the sweet meat mixing with the salty cheese, all of it coming together in a harmonious medley of flavor thus far unseen on the American fast food landscape–I was smitten. It was the single greatest fast food meal in the history of civilization. Even though I was full, I immediately ate another Double-Double. I was nearly in tears at this meal, it was so transcendently excellent.
So I guess I really wanted to say that In-N-Out is the best fast food restaurant ever, and I would go here over hundreds of real restaurants. And Tucker Max is indeed great.
P.S. I have an exam soon so I’ll probably be eating out every day for two weeks. Hopefully I’ll go to a variety of places so I won’t have to post about Panera 10 times.
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